November 25th, 2016

I am weary.

Goodness,
I look awful.
Who is that woman in the glass?
I feel awful.
I hurt inside and out.
Body, mind and spirit
I am always in distress.
I am weary of it all
Weary, oh so weary.

My spirt is so weary.
Weary of worry,
Weary of pain.
Weary of going without,
Weary of the doing without
Weary of scrimping
Weary of the guilt
Weary of the strain
Weary of the unknown
Weary of how the body looks
Weary of how the body doesn't work
Weary of being unable to take care of myself
Weary of the exhaustion
Weary, so very weary.

My mind is so weary.
Weary of brain fog
Weary of confusion
Weary of unknowing
Weary of not comprehending
Weary of struggling
Weary of the exhaustion
Weary, so very weary.

My body is so weary
Weary of the struggle
Weary of falling down
Weary of the body pains
Weary of the disfunction
Weary of being ill
Weary of the sleepless nights
Weary of the weakness
Weary, so very weary.

I am so weary of being trapped.
Trapped in a body so weary
Trapped in pain
Trapped in hopelessness
Trapped inside my home
Trapped inside my room
Trapped until I die
Weary, trapped and so very weary.

I am so weary of my life
Life goes on around me
Life goes on without me
Life is empty and remote
Life happens to other people
Life stopped for me long ago
Life lived but whispers of the past
Weary, life stopped, so very weary.

Weary
So Very Weary

~Phyllis Griffiths, 2016